In Need of a Kat Nap

“Good Night”- The Beatles. Written by John Lennon. Sung by Ringo Starr. This is my go-to ‘good night, go to sleep’ song. What? You mean you don’t have one? I have songs for every occasion, every situation, you name it. (But I think that’s another post…..or maybe a challenge…) I like this song. (I know- big surprise- Kat likes a Beatles song written by John.) I like the dreamy feel of the melody, that it was said that John wrote it for his son, Julian, as a lullaby, that Ringo is singing it and you can clearly hear the vulnerability in his voice….. it’s a good feeling.

2015 appears to be off to a less than auspicious start for me. My dreams of beginning the year with my word- focus- clearly in sight and mind began to slip away rather quickly. I don’t like big social functions. I really don’t like hosting parties in my own home. I can’t find the word that aptly describes how I feel about having a party in my house where the majority of my guests aren’t really speaking to me. This is how my year began as I was preparing for my son’s graduation party, complete with a sick dog and crabby kids. Throughout Michael’s party, I was only focused on one thing- for it to be over. I feel bad about that but it’s over. Immediately following the party, I had agreed to watch the little guys so their parents could grab some much needed time together. That’s where the word SLEEP comes to play.

It took a few years but my husband and I finally worked out a good teamwork strategy when dealing with the kids, especially in those new baby days- divide and conquer. Old habits die hard and with a 5 year old and 5 week old to care for, we easily slipped back into our roles with him taking CJ and me in charge of little Beej. In theory, it was a great plan. The only problem was that it’s been 19 years since I dealt with a newborn and those late night feedings and sleep deprivation. When you add in my own paranoia, I barely slept.

So, maybe I didn’t actually climb into the crib, but remember, my babies were tummy sleepers, so I would keep bending closer and closer, laying a hand on the baby’s back to feel him breathing, until I would finally use enough pressure to cause the baby to squirm. Then, and only then, could I rest easy.

Two nights, little sleep……. results in no posts, an incomplete (incoherent) Kat Got Your Tongue Challenge post…. and no goals established…..and a smattering of “likes” on some of the blogs I’m following but very few comments. AND one very cranky Kat.

I have suffered from insomnia and bad sleep patterns for 25 years. It isn’t coincidence that my sleep issues can be traced back to my first pregnancy when I was no longer able to sleep on my stomach. I have always been a light sleeper but losing my favorite sleep position just did me in. Little did I know, I would never get it back.

Can I share an ironic little bit of Kat-trivia? Back in my early 20’s, I would talk to my friend, Rob, on the phone while he was at work. He was always referring to this one guy who worked for him who could sleep anywhere. This guy became a common topic of discussion. How was it possible to sleep at a construction site sitting in a hot truck? It seemed like this guy slept at every opportunity. I just didn’t get it. Little did I know- this guy would become my brother-in-law and I was going to marry into a family of people who seemed to worship sleep. I strongly believe that if they could just sleep through life they would die happy. (I still don’t get it. Sleep is good and all and you need it to function but life is for living….not sleeping….just my thoughts on it.)

I went to bed at 7pm last night. I kept falling asleep on the couch so it was time. I slept. (Thank god!) And then I woke up at about 4am with post ideas running through my head. I found myself being nagged by the unfinished and two day late Kat challenge. I needed a to-do list. That schedule wasn’t going to write itself. (I had to set up a meeting for Friday. Andrew needed new shoes before he leaves on Saturday. Those party supplies need to be put away. )   And it wasn’t long before I knew that I would not be going back to sleep. I tabled the unfinished challenge post for another day.

And I came to the realization that I need to add a component on the “Me” section of my goals where I work on giving myself a break. In the middle of being totally exhausted, my internal running commentary of all the things I should be doing was causing some major mental and emotional draining, similar to those apps that are running in the background on your phone, draining your battery. Yes, I needed to come up with a plan, a list, something……but if it didn’t officially begin until next week, it wouldn’t hurt anything. And maybe those extra days to get back on track would actually give me the boost I need to feel inspired and ready to face the year. 🙂 Who knows- I might actually get some much needed rest, too.

katgotyourtongue This post is in response to Kat Got Your Tongue Challenge- Sleep

Hello, 2015!

I am happy to say goodbye to 2014. It wasn’t a bad year. You can read about the highlights in my post- 2014, Oh, What a Year it Was! It was a very important year in the lives of all my children. It was filled with a wedding, graduations, big moves, college and a new baby. Since these were major life events for my children, of course they were also important for me.

As a parent, you tend to put your children’s needs first. Although all three of my kids are now legal adults, they all needed me last year. I have to say that in 24 years of parenting, I have never felt stretched so thin before. I love my kids more than anything else in the world and I wouldn’t change a single minute of the past year. I knew it was going to be a busy year and I thought it might be a little tough. I didn’t have a clue. This was the most physically exhausting and emotionally draining year of my life.

The only thing I really did for myself was start this blog. In the nine months since I published my first post, it has been something I have cherished. I didn’t know where I was headed, what I wanted it to be, or if I could even stick with it, but I did! There were times when I was writing posts on my iPad while we were on the road and in the month of November, most of my work came from a hospital room with my daughter-in-law. But I stuck with it and I’m proud of myself. It could have been so easy to set it aside and promise myself I would get back to writing when things quieted down.

It’s a new year and it’s time for change. After a year spent devoted to my children, it’s time for me to claim some of my life back for me. I brought up the topic of resolutions vs. goals in the last Kat Got Your Tongue challenge and many bloggers have posted one or the other or their decision to do neither.

I have chosen my word for 2015. Although I was overwhelmed by the possibilities earlier this week, I knew deep down inside what my word for the year needed to be. FOCUS. It’s time for me to gain some focus back in my life.

My goals will be centered around the following areas-

Me- Finding time for myself and taking care of minor health issues will be the driving forces behind these goals.

Writing- My blog will take up a big part of this section. I expect my blogging goals to be a bit flexible, depending on the area of focus. Working on appearance, posts, organization, social media and blogging community will keep me busy. The longer term goal in this area will be preparing for NaNoWriMo 2015.

Family and Friends- With so much of my time caught up with my kids this past year, it’s time for me to reconnect with my friends and family.

Home- I’m going to form an action plan to aid in de-cluttering and organizing my house. I would like to start work on making my home office a place where I can work and relax.

Some of these will be much simpler to accomplish than others. I see a lot of scheduling in my future but after a year where I had little control over my schedule due to everyone else’s commitments, I look forward to seeing a calendar filled with my own things. My next step is to have a more detailed list so I can prioritize and have goals in place by next week. I’m hoping that having weekly goals and checking on the progress of those goals will help to keep me on track. In turn, my goal is for all of this to help me stay focused and gain focus.

Donna Andrews writes the Meg Langslow mystery series and the main character, Meg, always refers to “my-notebook-that-tells-me-when-to-breathe”. I’ve always thought that I needed one of those and now seems to be the right time.

What are you doing to ensure you are successful in reaching your goals or keeping your resoluntions?

Kat Got Your Tongue- Focus


This week’s prompt is FOCUS! How do you stay focused?

I hope you will share your thoughts with me. You can see what I have to say about the topic below!




I’m having a problem with focus. Just trying to write this week’s challenge (which I actually wrote for the first time on Saturday), I’ve changed the topic 4 times. Finally, I settled on “Focus” because I was struggling so much. The truth is that my mind is racing out in so many different directions right now that I can’t concentrate on this post. So, fellow bloggers, how do you keep focused? How do you quiet your mind? Any tips for me?

Weekly Shout Outs-

This week I would like to thank the following bloggers for participating-

~Deborah over at Notes Tied on the Sagebrush . You can read her response to Saturday Mornings here. While you are there, please be sure to look at all the cool things she posts throughout the week.

~ Julie at Julie Powell- Graphic Artist. Julie responded to the Theme Song prompt with a very interesting soundtrack list. You can read it here. I have just recently started following her and I really like what I’ve seen.

Quiet the Mind


When I first saw this on my Facebook wall, I thought, hmmm, yes, sounds good in theory. I’ve been having some problems with writer’s block, organizing my office, getting Andrew ready for college, preparing my house for the arrival of Kris, a big family weekend gathering to plan, and then my regular daily responsibilities and commitments. I’ve been a bit overwhelmed and feeling quite ineffective. Although I think this is easier said than done, I’m going to concentrate on “quieting the mind” in hopes of gaining back the focus that I seem to be lacking.