The Great Book of Lists: Chapters 5.2- Elements of My Day

The idea for this list comes from Brandon Burchard’s day planner. As a snapshot of your current life, it will allow you to leave a trace of what your days are made of, what you truly enjoy and what you’re really looking for.

So, just this once here are the instructions to build your list :

• quickly jolt you to do list
• what are the 3 things you are excited about today
• what are the 3 things you are truly thankful for today

To Do-

• Straighten up home office
• Baby-sit the little guys
• Update calendar
• Work on blog

I am excited about-

• Spending time with the little guys
• Hopefully discovering goodies I purchased for my new “hideaway/retreat/mom cave” and packed away and forgot- while cleaning my office
• Seeing a dear friend

I am thankful for-

• My family
• The beautiful sunshiny day
• Quiet time

This is another chapter in The Great Book of Lists.

The Great Book of Lists: Chapter 5.1- People Who Inspired You

This week’s challenge-

“It’s not about Dedcartes, Churchill, Coelho ou any other inspiring thinkers, whose quotes flourish the internet and the social networks.

No, this week is about a list of real people, unknown (or almost) to the world who had a real impact on our life.

Sometimes, just a little thing, a park, a teacher’s precepts, a piece of advice from a friend, you surely had such encounters in your life,  or people who did little but changed the face of your world.

So much gratitude an so many memories for these little but so significant inspirations”

• My mother- She’s one of the strongest people I know. She is not demonstrative but I have never doubted her love for me a single day in my life. She taught me all of my fierce mama tiger skills.
• My father- His love of music impacted my life in so many different ways. He has been accused of not having a filter when he speaks but I love that he just says it. Because these words come from his heart, there’s no doubting his sincerity. I have tried to follow his lead and not worry so much about saying the wrong thing in a world where political correctness is the name of the game.
• My 3- Steph, Diane and John. They are all examples of the kind of friend I hope to be.
• My kids- They inspire me daily- Michael, my firstborn- who changed my existence on the day he was born. He gave my life purpose. Kris, my changeling- who has inspired me to keep on moving, even when every step feels like it weighs a ton. Andrew, my baby- whose quiet presence made our family complete.
• My husband- His never-ending support and stability have provided the foundation of our family and we would not exist without him.

To learn more about The Great Book of Lists, click HERE. You can find entries for this chapter- HERE.

So What?

As Kris’s hair grows longer and his gender expression becomes more feminine, people are asking “the” questions. (And if they aren’t asking in words, their expressions are.)

Did Kris change his mind?

Is he going back to being a girl?

Is he no longer transgender? 

What’s going on?

Okay, so, maybe they are asking many questions.

In answer to those questions:

No

No

No. If you aren’t sure, think double negatives here- No, he is not no longer transgender…. (Did I confuse you?)

I don’t know.

Thanks for stopping by! -Kat

…………

Just kidding. But in all seriousness, those are my answers. Except for the last one.

What’s going on? Kris remains a work in progress. When you spend your life living a certain way- in Kris’s case, living a girl’s life when you don’t necessarily feel like a girl, that is the only life you know. When Kris came out to us as transgender at 18, he only knew how to be a girl. Although we did not force him into a girl mold, society generally does a good job of that all on its own.

After transitioning and living his life as a guy, he knew that it wasn’t a good fit either. He was letting society dictate how he lived- even in the transgender community. If he was a trans guy, he felt that he had to stay on testosterone and wear a binder and look like a guy.

But he didn’t like wearing a binder most of the time and he didn’t want to take T and his feelings about top surgery were unclear. And he did not feel like a guy.

And that is how he got to this place in his journey.

He is non-binary, not really identifying as male or female but something different. It is a difficult concept for people to wrap their heads around. It was definitely easier (easier being used in the broadest sense) for people to accept him as a guy. Most don’t understand what it means to be non-binary, especially because it isn’t as simple as boy or girl. Many hold the belief that everyone is one or the other.There is no other option…. but there is. And Kris is living proof. Even if it’s hard to understand.

But that’s not the point at all. It’s all about acceptance. I was reminded of this when I was having a conversation with a friend, just trying to process it all. After sharing some of the questions I have gotten from people, my friend nodded his head thoughtfully and said, “And let’s just say that Kris decides to go back to using Kerri or feminine pronouns or both. So what? Does it change how you feel about him? Does it hurt anyone at all if Kris is Kris or Kerri or someone else?”

And the truth is it just doesn’t matter who Kris is as long as he is happy and healthy and ALIVE.

 

 

 

 

Hugh’s Weekly Photo Challenge: Week 26- Distance

There is nothing Ari likes more than hanging out in the back yard. She loves to survey her land from strategic points around our property. I imagine that in her head she is a fierce warrior protecting her people from certain doom.  She will sit, stand, or lay for hours, keeping her vigilant watch for any trespassers, whether they are humans, dogs or cheeky squirrels.  And if she’s lucky, some unsuspecting soul will accidentally step onto our property….or just into her line of vision and she will pounce into action, launching into a verbal assault that could rival a dog twice her size. And if it’s a really good day, her friend Buster from next door will be out and the two pups will stare at each other longingly across the yards, exchanging wags and excited barks. There is never a dull moment when Ari is on the job.

“Until one has loved an animal, a part of one’s soul remains unawakened.” 

-Anatole France

This week the prompt is “distance” for Hugh’s Weekly Photo Challenge: Week 26- Distance.

Hugh’s Weekly Photo Challenge: Week 25- Music

I remember back when my youngest, Andrew, was just the little brother of 2 older siblings who played woodwinds- clarinet/alto sax and clarinet/bass clarinet. He spent most of his early years being dragged to Michael’s and Kris’s events and he was a good sport. When he was around 7 years old, the older kids’ band director asked him, “So, what instrument are you going to play?” (Spoken like a true band director, please note- not “Are you going to play?” but “What are you going to play?”)

Andy considered the question and then gave his answer. “Something shiny and brass.” When he came home from band recruitment at the beginning of 5th grade, he proudly presented a certificate declaring him a trombone player. I was done with the whole “reed” experience so I was already hoping for ANYTHING that did not require a reed. I had no clue what we were in for with a budding trombonist in the house. Leave it to my quietest child to choose the loudest instrument.

I grew to love the sound of the trombone and especially that of my son playing. I learned to recognize his distinctive sound in a full orchestra. Andrew just completed his second year in one of the country’s top music schools. The photo above was taken at his recital this year. My quiet and gentle child continues to awe me and fill me with pride as he makes his mark in the world with his larger (and louder) than life talent.

This post is in response to Hugh’s Weekly Photo Challenge: Week 25- Music.