Case Closed

Last week I wrote about a visit from Navy Seals recruiters at my door- “Is Miss Kerri Carpita Home?” and I wanted to do a follow up.

After a few days of debating how to proceed and whether to call their 888 number or the local recruiting center, I made the call. I do realize it wasn’t that big of a decision. I was upset and afraid of what I was going to find out or worse- not find out.

I called the local recruiting center and the person who answered the phone was very patient as I stumbled through my explanation that someone had come knocking on my door asking for my child by a name that hadn’t been used in over 3 years. I explained that my child had legally changed their name and I had concerns about why this house call was made.

He, (the kind man who I cannot remember his title, rank, name….), said that sometimes they did visit someone at home if they were unreachable by phone. When I expressed my fear that this might be a practical joke (and a not nice one at that), he offered to look into the matter and get back to me.

A half hour later, seconds before I walked into a meeting with the superintendent, he called back.

Their records indicated that they were using information from a college list that had been distributed in 2011 (the year Kris graduated from high school). He explained that the Navy is trying to recruit more women and that’s why they looked back that far into their lists. He said he would remove Kris’s old name from their records and apologized for the inconvenience.

I walked into my meeting, sat down, took one look at the superintendent and cried. Thank goodness he is a super cool awesome guy who I have a good relationship with. 🙂

I am relieved. With a few very tiny exceptions, the worse Kris has endured is being treated as if he ceases to exist. I didn’t want him to be facing worse and by someone he used to know.

Side note- Being treated as if he doesn’t exist is not acceptable either and I worry about the long term impact that could have on Kris. It’s why I no longer attend family functions on either sides of our relatives. Watching aunts, uncles and cousins ignore and avoid Kris makes me so angry I cannot see straight.

Have a good one!

Kat

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18 thoughts on “Case Closed

  1. I learned this when M was in school (from a PBS story on military recruiters):

    Today the military has access to high school students because of the federal No Child Left Behind Act of 2001. Schools receiving federal funds must give the military the same access that college and career counselors have or risk losing their federal money. Unless parents specifically request otherwise, schools must give the military personal contact information, addresses and telephone numbers, for their students.

    Funny that the colleges weren’t as aggressive with trying to get M to talk to them…of course, he had bad grades, so maybe I am comparing the wrong apples to some weird oranges. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kris was probably a very attractive prospect if they knew how well rounded he was (as a girl in high school) between swimming, music, academics and drama.

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    1. I’m just so relieved that there was nothing to worry about.

      I’m not sure I will ever get over losing my siblings but if they cannot support my son when he needs it most, then I don’t need them here. They seem to do more bad than good and my other sons see how they treat Kris and they don’t like it at all. I’m sure my siblings think I turned my kids against them but the truth is that if there are any ill feelings there, they caused it themselves.

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    1. The grandparents are doing really good. They are trying and they make Kris feel loved. My husband has many married siblings and I’m pretty sure that maybe 3 or 4 of them are okay with Kris. But that leaves twice as many who either ignore him or rush through pleasantries so they can move on. My side is such a train wreck at this point because I haven’t stayed quiet about their lack of support.

      We really do best when it’s just us 8- my husband, me, my boys, daughter in law and the little guys. It’s a shame but apparently more people put conditions on their love than I realized.

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    1. I think the hardest part is that if you talk to them, they swear they love and support Kris. (They just don’t show it.)

      I know that there are people who have it worse- they are completely disowned by their families and worse. It’s just a shame that these relatives can’t see that their actions hurt Kris and they might as well toss him out of their lives. I keep harboring hope that some day they will come around and actually behave as if they love and support him. Until then, I lay low to avoid ripping them all to shreds (verbally, of course!)

      Liked by 1 person

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